Re: [問題] 請問有人還記得亞利安星球答辯法嗎

看板SouthPark (南方公園)作者ikew (以哭)時間16年前 (2008/03/07 20:51)推噓4(4推 0噓 0→)

留言4則, 3人參與討論串4/5 (看更多)

補原文版的台詞 Ladies and gentlemen of the SUPPOSED jury... Chef’s attorney would certainly want you to believe that his client wrote “Stinky Britches” ten years ago. And they make a good case. Hell, I almost felt pity myself! The jury listens, intrigued. JOHNNIE COCHRAN (cont’d) But ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury... I have one final thing I want you to consider... Cochran pulls down a chart with a picture of Chewbacca. JOHNNIE COCHRAN (cont’d) Ladies and gentlemen, THIS is CHEWbacca. Chewbacca is a wookie from the planet Kashyyk. But Chewbacca LIVES on the planet ENDOR... Now think about that... That DOESN’T MAKE SENSE! JOHNNIE COCHRAN (cont’d) Why would a Wookie, an EIGHT FOOT TALL Wookie want to live on endor with a bunch of two foot tall Ewoks? THAT DOES not MAKE SENSE! A murmur goes through the jury. JOHNNIE COCHRAN (cont’d) But MORE importantly, you have to ask yourself ‘What does this have to do with this case’? NOTHING. Ladies and gentlemen it has NOTHING to do with this case. IT DOES NOT MAKE SENSE. Now Cochran paces in front of the jury. JOHNNIE COCHRAN (cont’d) Look at me, I’m a lawyer defending a major record company and I’m talking about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I AM NOT MAKING ANY SENSE! NONE OF THIS MAKES SENSE. Now he pauses. JOHNNIE COCHRAN (cont’d) And so you have to remember, when you’re in that jury room deliberatin and conjugatin the emancipation proclamation -- Does it make sense? No. Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does NOT MAKE SENSE. If Chewbacca lives on Endor YOU MUST ACQUIT. The defense rests. Cochran returns to his seat. JUDGE O...kay then. *阿炳律師在原文版的名字是JOHNNIE COCHRAN 曾經幫Michael Jackson的孩童性侵案辯護,也曾經幫O.J.Simpson辯護過相關資料(英文) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Johnnie_Cochran *Chewbacca是星際大戰裡面的角色 214的英文劇本 http://sp.rocpoint.com/pre/b/214.pdf -- ※ 發信站: 批踢踢實業坊(ptt.cc) ◆ From: 203.67.210.28 ※ 編輯: ikew 來自: 203.67.210.28 (03/07 20:53)